EridanTale
by NovaStars42
Summary: Eridan makes friends with Frisk online by mistake and after getting in a couple of fights with his friends, goes to visit. With the Orphaner off planet, all hell is breaking loose with Feferi and his friends back home. [A Homestuck/Undertale au where Eridan travels, Underground is its own planet, and Frisk is the only on who can one up the purple prince]
1. Chapter 1

So this is just a side project I started because I'm an unorganized worker and start new projects while I work on old ones. It'll be short, and have short chapters. I kinda tweaked people to fit my bill. Eridan is a little nicer than he should be, and Frisk talks. Frisk is also super friendly, and this story is based on the True pacifist ending, though it never occurred that way since this is an AU.

Please enjoy!

* * *

December 28, 201X

underDetermined [UD] began pestering caliginousAquarium [CA]

UD: Hey Undyne!

CA: wwho the hell is this

UD: Oh, I've got the wrong tag, sorry about that.

CA: wwho the fuck is this I've got enough important shit to do wwithout you hangin' around, pesterin' the shit outta me, typin' away with your moronic self just wwho the fuck is this

UD: I'll just go, sorry again.

CA: oh alright, I accept your pathetic apology.

CA: happy?

UD: uhh…? Sure?

CA: howw did you get this tag is this some kind of fuckin' joke vvris is that you if it is I swear I'll cull you were you stand you diluted blue blooded idiot

UD: I just said it was an accident! Geeez!

UD: My friend's new tag is close to yours.

CA: wwhatevver a likely story

CA: nonsense spewed from the mouth of a land dweller no doubt

UD: I would hope I was a land dweller? Wait, where do you live?

CA: none of your goddamn business

UD: Wow, okay. Touchy much?

CA: oh shut up ain't like your fuckin' feelin's got hurt by a stranger or did they because thats pathetic

UD: Rude!

CA: jegus I hope for your sake your skin is thicker than this

CA: your pitiful cry my a goddamn rivver

UD: I don't have to put up with this nonsense. Your ridiculous.

CA: your still here

CA: stop buggin' and fussin' and meddlin' over nothin' this is a wwaste of my time

UD: That's it, I'm leaving.

CA: no skin off my nose I couldnt care less what the hell you do

underDetermined [UD] ceased pestering caliginousAquarium [CA]

* * *

January 3, 201X

caliginousAquarium [CA] began trolling underDetermined [UD]

CA: are you there

UD: I thought you didn't want to talk to me?

CA: i nevver said anythin' like that not in the slightest

UD: Yeah, okay. If your gonna be rude I'm leaving again. Did you need something?

CA: no

caliginousAquarium [CA] ceased trolling underDetermined [UD]

* * *

January 18, 201X

caliginousAquarium [CA] began trolling underDetermined [UD]

UD: Uh, hi again

CA: hello

CA: so you

CA: did you evver find your other friend

CA: the one you mistaked her tag for mine

UD: Oh! Yes, I did.

UD: You'd like her. Your both sort of rude, no offense. Well.. Maybe some.

CA: You just failed to see the eloquence of my wwords how else wwould somebody react to bein' bothered by a damn stranger

UD: Er, yeah. Whatever you say.

The glass of water on the desk next to him shook, causing Eridan to sigh. Feferi's lusus was hungry again. The Erdrich monster's whispers were loud enough to vibrate things outside the water, and that was a bit concerning. His flush crush would be here any moment to ask for his help.

CA: i havve to go

UD: Okay?

caliginousAquarium [CA] ceased trolling underDetermined [UD]

* * *

February 19, 201X

caliginousAquarium [CA] began trolling underDetermined [UD]

UD: Hi, uh, hold on, I don't think I know your real name.

CA: Eridan

UD: Hi, Eridan! I'm Frisk.

CA: wwhatevver

UD: What, your not gonna insult me like you usually do?

CA: no i ain't exactly up to it

UD: What's wrong?

CA: its just

CA: growin' up is hard

CA: its hard and no one understands

UD: Tell me about it.

UD: do you wanna talk about it?

Eridan paused, staring blankly at his screen. Did they really just? This explained so much.

This person sounded like they were waxing honest to god pale for him.

CA: actually

CA: yeah I kinda do

* * *

March 13, 201X

caliginousAquarium [CA] began trolling underDetermined [UD]

CA: so I got a question

CA: are wwe pale

UD: Well, I don't know about you, but my skins more of a… Wait hold on

CA: not like that you moron

CA: I mean are wwe morails or wwhat

UD: Well I think we're friends? I don't know. You spend an awful lot of time being rude. I'm not even sure I knew what a morail is

CA: hold on wwhere are you

UD: I'm not exactly supposed to just tell people I just meet two months ago where I live. My mom would flip.

CA: wwhat planet do you livve on

UD: it's called Underground. In the B413 Galaxy.

CA: oh I thought that you

CA: never mind

Sighing, Eridan put his face in his hands. This person wasn't a troll. No quadrants.

His instant messages binged again.

UD: where do you live?

CA: I livve on this stupid rock of shit called Alternia

UD: Oh! I've heard of that planet! My mom teaches me about all kinds of stuff instead of going to school.

UD: she said you guys had uh, I can't remember. Something instead of parents. Like, animals? Parents are like, uh

CA: I knoww wwhat parents are my idiot friends talk to a bunch of heathens from another planet too

CA: sounds like a bunch of damn silly carry on to me my lusus is the best

UD: Yeah! Lusus, that's it! Tell me more about him?

Eridan would never pass up an opportunity to talk about himself, er, his lusus.

* * *

March 20, 201X

underDetermined [UD] began pestering caliginousAquarium [CA]

April 6, 201X

underDetermined [UD] began pestering caliginousAquarium [CA]

May 4, 201X

caliginousAquarium [CA] began trolling underDetermined [UD]

June

underDetermined [UD] began pestering caliginousAquarium [CA]

July

caliginousAquarium [CA] began trolling underDetermined [UD]

August

underDetermined [UD] began pestering caliginousAquarium [CA]

* * *

December 31, 201X

underDetermined [UD] began pestering caliginousAquarium [CA]

UD: Hey! Know what I just realized?

CA: youvve seen the error in your land wwalkin' ways and decided to cull yourself

UD: No! Don't be stupid!

UD: We've been friends for a whole year!

CA: oh

CA: so wwe have

UD: Oh! By the way! Happy New Year Eridan :)

CA: yeah happy neww year

CA: hey Fris

UD: Yeah?

CA: thanks

CA: for bein' my friend

UD: No Problem. Thank you too.

UD: I've got the best story for you. You'll never guess what Sans did this morning, mom freaked.

* * *

caliginousAquarium [CA] began trolling underDetermined [UD]

CA: hey

UD: Hey! What's up?

CA: same old. vvris blocked me, fef don't wwanna be friends anymore, I think kans had enough of my bullshit too

UD: No offense but your friends all seem kinda… Edgy. Wait, that's not the right word. Crazy?

CA: yeah wwhatevver

UD: Your that down? Did you even crack a smile?

CA: I don't feel much like smilin'

UD: Hold on just a second

underDetermined is an idle chum!

CA:

underDetermined is an active chum!

UD: Sorry, had to ask my mom something.

UD: How would you like to come visit us for a while?

CA: wwhat

CA: like come to your hive

CA: house

UD: Yeah! I mean I don't have a huge house, but we've got a couch. Or I guess you could stay at the inn nearby if you didn't want to stay here.

CA: are you serious

UD: As serious as butterscotch pie!

CA: jegus

CA: this is just out of the damn blue

UD: You don't have to! Sorry if this was too foreword of me.

CA: wwhen wwere you intending

UD: Whenever!

CA: I'll be there

underDetermined sent coordinates

* * *

Procuring a mode of transportation off planet was the hardest part of the trip. The ship he was taking had crashed some time ago near his hive, carrying an adult troll. Once they were sure the terrifying adult was dead, he and Vriska simply just fed him to Vriska's lusus and commandeered his possessions. They took everything except for the ship, which they let sink to the bottom of the ocean.

It'd taken some pestering, but eventually he somehow conned Equius to fix it for him. The sweating hulk of a brute did it without much complaint. He did like to be ordered around, after all.

Eridan didn't tell anyone he was leaving. They'd figure it out sooner or later when he stopped murdering for Feferi's lusus. With Ahab's Crosshairs in the cargo hold, he climbed into the cockpit of the ship.

caliginousAquarium [CA] began trolling underDetermined [UD]

CA: I'm leavvin' now probably wwon't have Internet

UD: Yay! I'll see you in a few days!

UD: I'm so excited to meet you!

Closing the app, he turned the key on the ship and listened as the engines whirred to life. They sounded good. He hoped they'd fly just as well. Eridan smiled, if only a little.

He hoped his lusus would be alright.

* * *

caliginousAquarium [CA] began trolling underDetermined [UD]

CA: so do you just wwant me to jump dowwn this hole

CA: just fuckin' jump dowwn this big ass hole

The surface of this planet was mostly barren grasslands and freshwater lakes. The foliage was knee high, and a bright emerald that put Kanaya's blood to shame. The water was a deep, rich blue. No pollution. These people knew how to take care of a planet.

From his previous position in space, it looked so strange to approach a planet so similar to his own green moon.

His landing had gone alright, he hadn't crashed. And he was picking up wifi.

He used the navigation feature on his husktop to follow the coordinates about a mile south. He thanked himself for being active as a child, because it lead him right up the side of a god forsaken mountain. It'd only taken him about an hour to get where he needed to go.

The app said he was in the right spot, but instead of his friend, all he was meet with was a gaping black cavern in to the planet's center. Eridan looked around. There was nothing else here.

UD: Hey! Your planet side!

UD: Yeah, just jump.

UD: I promise you won't die, I didn't.

The purple blood scratched his head. Wait, what?

UD: I'm waiting for you down here!

Eridan gazed down in to the black void. He thought about throwing something down it, just to see how long it'd take to get to the bottom. He decided against it. Frisk was down there.

He took a few steps back, shut his eyes, and flung himself over the edge.


	2. Chapter 2

When he opened his eyes, Eridan was meet with a face full of yellow.

Yellow flowers carpeted the ground and they had also broken his fall. His back sort of hurt, and he was sprawled out like a wriggler, but he wasn't dead.

"Eridan?"

He groaned. "Yeah, I'm Eridan."

He sat up, using one arm to support himself. He was a bit dizzy, and when his eyes came back into focus, he noticed his surroundings. This room was dark, with jagged, damp walks. Sunlight streamed in from the hole he'd just fallen through, providing for the patch of flowers he'd landed in.

In the center of his vision stood a person.

"Wow," they grinned, "I didn't think you'd look like that."

"You're not exactly how I imagined either," he muttered, his head clearing. "Frisk?"

The person grinned, nodding. "It's nice to finally meet you."

Frisk held out a hand to help him up, smiling.

On Alternia, Eridan would have been hesitant, but today, here on this planet, he had no fears.

Eridan took their hand and stood.

Frisk wore a sweater, striped with color similar to his scarf, and a pair of shorts. They're hair was shoulder length and cropped off straight. They were shorter than him. He remembered most members his race would grow to be over six foot tall, and he wondered if that was average height for a… Wait, hold on.

"Your human?" He asked.

"Yeah."

The sea-dwellers eyebrows furrowed. He hadn't imagined his friend would be human. A couple of his other friends were talking to humans too. Kanaya was pretty much smitten with hers. Poppy was it? Tulip? Rose maybe?

He also hadn't expected them to be so.. Androgynous looking.

"Sorry about this, well, not really, but are you a girl or a boy?"

A patient smile crossed their face. "Neither."

That was perplexing. They had to be something biologically. "Yeah, okay, but whats in your pants then?"

Frisk didn't look impressed. His concern for their correct pronouns had come across as rude.

"Determination," they answered.

Eridan smirked. That was a pretty good answer.

"My turn," they chatted, "can I touch the horns?"

Touch his..? People back home kept their hands to themselves, always. He wasn't used to this.

"I suppose," he replied, and ducked his head down.

He couldn't feel his horns, so he couldn't feel the hand running along the candy corn colored curves. He'd felt them himself though, he knew they were smooth to the touch.

Vaguely, Eridan remembered he'd had his husktop under his arm when he'd jumped. He looked around and there it was. Half buried under the flowers lay his husktop, broken in two.

"Shit," he huffed, going to it and picking it up.

"Oh, that sucks! My friend can fix it for you," Frisk offered.

"Ain't got no other choice," the sea dweller muttered.

"Hey, come on, you can use my computer," the human smiled, "let's go, alright? I want you to meet my mom!"

* * *

Frisk's house was deep in the ruins. Or maybe it was on the outskirts. Eridan couldn't really tell in the twisting maze. Everything was made of stone, and covered in vines, and sometimes Frisk had to trip switches so they could progress to the next room.

The house was nothing special. The outside was plain with a flower bed flanking the door.

The main foyer held only a plant, a book case and a set of stairs. The same wood flooring and beige wallpaper looked like it ran through the entire house.

"Mom!" Frisk called.

"In the kitchen, my child!" A soft voice returned. It brought a smile to Frisk's face.

Frisk lead the way through the house, through a living room with a fireplace and a dinning table, to the kitchenette.

The kitchen was yellow, and tiled with tall cupboards, and standing in the middle, with its back to him, stood..

"Mom, meet Eridan."

This creature was Frisk's mom? When the woman (and he used that word loosely) turned to him, he thought she looked like Gamzee's goat lusus. She had long ears and a skinny snout but with protruding fangs. Her horns dwarfed his in size. And what, was she shedding some of that white fur? Disgusting.

"It is nice to meet you, I am Toriel," she smiled, gently.

"Eridan," he spoke loftily, sticking his hand out for her to shake.

"I would, dear, but I've got dough all over my hands," she seemed apologetic as she explained.

It didn't bother Eridan in the least. Upon closer inspection, the woman's white paws were caked with a layer of flower.

"You said you were like royalty on your planet, Eridan?" Frisk interjected, "My mom used to be queen!"

"Oh, now, it wasn't like that at all," Toriel blushed, turning back to the tin she was stuffing with pie crust.

"Mom, you either were queen or you weren't," Frisk smirked, "and I'm pretty sure you were."

Toriel threw a warning look over her shoulder. Frisk giggled.

"Why don't you show your friend around, get him settled, hm?" Toriel asked, "dinner will be done soon."

Without another word, Frisk grasped Eridan's hand and drug him out of the kitchen. Eridan balked, not used to the touching, but he let them anyway.

"This is the living room, obviously," they started, and gestured to the couch, "no tv, but we just got this couch. It's super comfortable."

"Kinda empty, don't you think?" Eridan suggested, eyebrows raised.

"Oh, yeah. Mom likes plain," Frisk nodded, moving through the foyer and to the hallway. "The far door doesn't open, the middle is mom's room, and this one is mine."

Frisk pushed open the first door on their left, and let them both inside. It was a bit more decorated, but still lacked something.

Eridan had to remind himself his tastes were a bit.. Tacky.

Yeah, okay, maybe this room wasn't so bad. It was tidy to say the least.

The walls were the same beige as the rest of the house, but a large dog poster accompanied by several framed pictures hung on the wall. The computer was situated against the wall, but the bed stuck out into the room. Marks on the wall signaled that the furniture had not always been where it was now.

"Fris, I gotta ask," Eridan began, losing interest in his surroundings. The human's attention perked.

"You look nothin' like your mom. What's up with that?"

A year and six months of friendship had prepared Frisk well for this in person meeting. They didn't seem surprised at all with the shrewd, snobby remarks he was making.

"I'm adopted. You are too, technically. Seeing as youre not a seahorse," they retorted. They had him there. Eridan shrugged.

"The bathroom is across the hall," Frisk continued, "Do you need to use the computer?"

"If you wouldnt mind me doin' so."

"Sure. There's no password on the tower. I'll call my friend to see about fixing yours, okay?" Frisk held their hands out and hesitantly, Eridan handed over his broken husktop. The human smiled, or maybe they were still smiling. It took him off guard again, he found himself rubbing his arm, unsettled. This whole thing was unsettling.

Why was everyone so friendly? And why did their queen live in a house not fit for rust bloods? Did they not practice culling on this planet?

The human disappeared back into the living room, and a phone's staccato beeping filled the air, along with the smell of something sweet in the oven. Cinnamon, he thought.

The spiced scent followed him into Frisk's room where he sat down at the desk top and waved the mouse to wake the computer up. He accessed the Internet and logged on to Trollian messenger.

cuttlefishCuller [CC] began trolling caliginousAquarium

CC: —–E RIDAN

CC: W)(ere have you been?

CC: I have been looking all over for you!

CA: sorry fef Im not home

CC: Y–Es! I can sea that!

CC: W)(–ER–E ar–E you!?

CC: mom is getting a bit fussy!

CA: yeah about that fef

CA: I cant help you with that right now

CC: Eridan youre making me reely worried. W)(ere are you?

CA: Im on a planet three days from ours

CA: it's called underground in the B413 galaxy

CA: 8°15'2.10"N 3°11'20.9"E.

CC: —-E RIDAN

CC: HOW IN ALTERNIA DID YOU GET TH—ER—E

CC: COM—E BACK

CA: sorry fef

CA: im here for at least another week

CC: Eridan! You )(ave to come back! The drones won't let you back in the atmosp)(ere! )(ow did you even get off?

CA: remember that useless puddle jumping hunk of star skipping junk that sank four sweeps ago

CA: it ain't so useless no more

CA: equ fixed it for me and I set it on auto pilot

CA: those spiked headed bucket toting useless fuckin drones had their heads shoved so far up their chastises they didn't even notice me

CC: I'm glad your safe, Eridan, but you have to come home! We need you )(ere!

CA: heres the thing fef you knoww I really like you and if I'm gonna be straight up honest with myself here I might have to say that youvve been usin' me

CA: and ivve know for a while but it's startin' to bother me fef

CA: I knoww you dont wanna be pale no more and your flush wwith that lispin' fuck face of a mustardblooded asshole

CA: but I think ivve had enough

CC: Eridan!

CC: Eridan, I'm not using you!

CC: Your caste has been )(elping mine for )(undreds of sweeps! I thought we did this because we were friends! I never asked you to help me, you said you did this because you wanted to!

CC: And leave Sollux out of this!

CA: wwhatever fef

He was about to type another response when Frisk shouted for him in the other room.

"Yeah?"

"Dinners ready!" They hollered.

"Comin'!"

CA: I gotta go fef

CaliginousAquarium [CA] ceased trolling cuttlefishCuller [CC]

He logged off without even bothering to read the rest of Feferi's messages.

The house smelled entirely of cinnamon now, with butterscotch and hints hickory wood from the fire. When Eridan entered the living room, the table was set and the food was on.

He seated himself next to Frisk, facing the kitchen where a pie was cooling on the counter.

The flame in the fireplace gave the room a warm glow on this late afternoon.

He looked down at the plate set in front of him and did a double take.

"What exactly am I lookin' at?" He asked.

"Hm?" Frisk hummed from a mouthful of food. They chewed before they answered.

"It's snail casserole."

Eridan nodded. He set to picking through the plate like it was yesterday's tuna. He must have made a face because Frisk urged him again to eat.

"It's good, and it's not weird, I promise."

"Would you rather something else, my child?" Toriel asked, looking worried. Her brows knitted and she frowned deeply in a way that reminded him of Kanaya.

"No, it's fine," he assured her, "I eat a lot of shellfish at home. Scallops, clams, things like that. I just never thought of puttin' it in uh, in a bowl of cooked noodles."

Eridan would never admit it, but he didn't exactly know how to cook. In fact, he usually just shoved a bunch of unbelievably shitty wizard wands in his fridge and called it good.

Eridan took a small, cautious bite.

It was pretty good, actually. Better than anything he'd made or seahorse dad drug home. It was sort of creamy, and soft, and he thought he might have tasted some peas and celery in with the noodles.

He liked it. A lot actually.

"Do you two usually do this sort of thing?" He asked between bites. He was a dainty, proper eater. He'd never so much as think of talking with his mouthful.

"What? Make casserole?" Frisk questioned.

"No, this whole," he cleared his throat, "sitten' at the table deal. Together. Do you both usually share meals?"

"Every night, yeah," Frisk agreed.

Toriel's expression had contrived from worried to something else Eridan couldn't place. Confusion maybe? Concern? "My child, do you not? I was under the impression that you had a caretaker at home."

"I do," Eridan agreed, "My lusus is the best. We just don't share meals. I feed him and then I usually eat something different. I might as well be some kinda glorified zookeeper. Where'd you get your information anyway?"

"Books," Toriel replied, a bit sheepish. Goatish.

"Dunno who wrote them, but it don't sound to me like they got the whole story," Eridan huffed, shoving another forkful of pasta in his mouth.

"I ain't much better though," he mused aloud, "I don't know jack about your culture either."

"I suppose this will be a learning experience for all of us," Toriel grinned.

"Indeed," Eridan agreed.

"I called my friend," Frisk interjected as that conversation tapered off, "she said if we bring her your laptop she can fix it."

"I don't know about going to Alphy's tonight," Toriel said, her motherly tone apparent.

"Undyne agreed to walk us back to Snowdin," Frisk countered.

Toriel narrowed her eyes and searched her child's face with suspicion.

"Please?" Frisk pleaded.

Sighing, the goat woman gave in. "Oh alright."

* * *

Eridan was glad he'd brought his cape. He'd tangled with it enough on the way to Underground he'd finally just taken it off in frustration, but he was glad he'd shoved it in his captchalogue. Outside the ruins where Frisk lived, the weather was locked in a perpetual winter.

How it could go from warm, flower growing weather to dry, chilled and snowing, Eridan would never know.

It didn't seem to bother Frisk in the least. Eridan thought that the sweater they wore must have been thicker than it looked. He pulled his cape closer to himself and shivered.

The town of Snowden was little and quant. If you blinked while walking through, you'd miss it. In the center of town was a large evergreen tree, decorated with colorful ornaments and adorned with shinning garlands for a holiday Eridan had never heard of. Surrounding it were houses and a few businesses, a library, an inn and a restaurant. They didn't stop at any of these places though. The cold air was still stinging Eridan's skin when Frisk lead him north, to a clearing near the bank of a river.

Tied to a tree and beached on the shore was a particular looking flat topped boat, with carvings on its bow and stern. A little dog lusus face, perhaps?

"I know the person who owns this, they won't mind if we borrow it," Frisk insisted, untying the knot, "you know how to do this, right? Because I don't."

"I'm used to sailing," Eridan sniffed, "but I suppose I can give it a shot."

He let Frisk board the boat first while he shoved off.

Eridan half expected some kind of off the handle crazy shit was going to happen, but it didn't. The river was shallow, and it was slow. Drifting was easy. All Eridan needed to do was use the large wooden staff that lay on the deck to keep them from hitting anything and let the current do the rest.

Downstream, an extremely buff dog lusus was throwing large cubes of ice. Besides having to contend with those, he also got into a deep conversation on what did and did not constitute a lusus. Apparently the creature was just a regular dog. Well, not a regular dog.

They drifted through a place of limbo, where the snow melted and the color of the earth changed from light brown, to a dark blue black, and the grass grew in a deep ebony. It got darker, and Eridan's pupils dilated, his eyes flickered, but his vision never faltered. His night vision activated.

"Whoa, you're like a night light," Frisk giggled, attracting his attention.

"Hm?"

"Your eyes, they kinda glow," the human observed.

It was a dim light, but Eridan was well aware of his own biology. He smoothed his collar and sat down, facing his friend.

"I can see in the dark too," he added.

"Really?" The human's eyes widened, "what's it like?"

"Mm," Eridan thought for a moment, "like regular, except dimmer. The colors aren't vibrant, and I can't see as far."

The earth had formed itself into swamp now. Streams and channels cut the marshy ground, and waterfalls shaped the ground. Eridan was so enamored by the water features, he almost missed the flowers.

Bioluminescent flowers decorated the landscape, growing tall and glowing bright blue and making his night vision unnecessary. Mushrooms sprung up under the flowers, and tall grass sprouted still. The light they gave off was like a halo. This place was beautiful, even more beautiful than his own planet.

"This place is somethin'," he muttered.

The light reflected off if Frisk's face, the whites of their eyes glowing pastel.

"I'm glad you came to visit," they returned, "I remember when I came here for the first time too. Underground is huge, but Snowdin and Waterfall here are the first places I ventured."

Eridan rose his eyebrows. "You haven't always lived here? I mean, I know you said you were adopted, but you're maken' it sound like you're new to this planet too."

Frisk nodded, and got comfortable, leaning on the stern.

"Yeah, I've only lived here a few years. About five, like, two and a half sweeps. I'm the only human on the planet, in case you were wondering."

"How'd in space time did you get here?" Eridan inquired.

"I crashed. See, on earth," they replied, readjusting their leg, "I was an orphan. I stole this prototype ship, and I just flew and flew and I got as far away as I could. I don't know about your planet, but on earth? Being an orphan is pretty bad."

Eridan suddenly felt… Something wash over him. Nervousness? Fear? Oh, Gog, no. This is was guilt, wasn't it? He looked away, rubbing his wrist absentmindedly.

It didn't matter how bad it was on earth, because he knew from his friends that humans were a non aggressive race. It wasn't like becoming an orphan would damn them to death, not like it did on Alternia.

Eridan swallowed the lump in his throat.

It was him that did the orphaning and he wouldn't mention that to Frisk.

"Hey, you okay?" The human's voice snapped him back to the present.

"Fine, yeah, I'm fine."


	3. Chapter 3

Frisk knew where to stop the boat, but they didn't mention it until they'd already passed it. It was an honest mistake, but it just made more work for Eridan. Huffing, he picked up the pole and tried to shove them back up river, but it was harder than it looked.

Finally, Eridan had enough of fighting the current and shed his scarf, cape and shirt. The water was shallow still, and he ended up wading through the drink to pull the boat ashore.

The ground here was different, though still back in color. The mushy swamp had faded in to obsidian rock, shining and warm. Vents of steam billowed out of holes off the path, and nothing grew here. The air around him was humid.

It was plain to anyone that something hot was nearby, but Eridan didn't know what exactly.

As he walked with Frisk up a steep incline, he found himself once again shedding his cape. Moments later he was forced to remove his scarf too. The air was becoming increasingly dry and stale. His pants had completely dried already.

Finally the hill crested and below Eridan saw the cause.

Sprawling fields of lava lay before him, hot and heavy like a weight on his shoulders.

"You okay?" Frisk asked.

"It's a bit warm, don't you think?" The sea-dweller huffed, "I ain't gaspin' but this ain't exactly preferable."

His hand found his gills, rubbing them as they expanded to gather moisture from the air.

"Oh, man, I'm sorry, I didn't even think about that! Are you sure you're okay?" Frisk gushed, turning to face him. "This happens to Undyne too, gosh. I feel like an idiot."

"As long as there's water sometime soon, I think it'll be alright," Eridan replied, a bit breathy.

"Sure! We'll be to the lab in no time!"

* * *

Eridan was having a hard time breathing by the time they reached the lab. He was tugging at his collar while Frisk knocked, er, had them buzzed in.

He took a deep breath as soon as it shut. Cool, air conditioned air flooded his lungs. His gills flared, trying to drink in the new moisture. He gasped and held it before he exhaled.

"I don't know what kinda idiot lives here, but this is hell on Alternia! Hell on Underground, whatever," he sighed, exasperated.

"Your not so _hot_ yourself."

Eridan spun around, and came face to face with a familiar pair of fins.

They weren't exactly like his, but very similar. The… Woman? (He was using that term loosely, yet again) standing in front of him was taller than him, which was surprising. She'd shaved her head, except for a long, flowing red pony tail. She was humanoid and fishlike, all wrapped in a pair of jeans that fit just a little too tightly.

"Undyne!" Frisk interjected, "meet Eridan!"

"Eridan, huh?" And then she whistled, long and low, "wow. Not like I pictured him."

Wait, so she knew him, but he didn't know her?

"That's what I said," the human laughed. "Eridan, you remember me telling you about Undyne, right?"

Undyne, Undyne. That sounded familiar but, wait, hold on. This was the person that Frisk has mixed his Trollian tag for? _This_ was them?

"I'd say I was pleased to make your acquaintance, but I don't know about that anymore," he snarked, puffing out his chest.

"Likewise, chump," Undyne spit, smirking.

"Guys, don't argue," Frisk said, looking suddenly worried.

"We aren't arguing, he's the only one talking," the fish woman sneered. Frisk huffed, putting their hands on their hips. Undyne rolled her eyes.

"Alright, alright. Whatever. I promise I won't hurt him or his precious ego."

"Likewise," Eridan returned but it went largely ignored.

Undyne held out her hand. Eridan stared at it for a moment, and then he realized she wanted him to shake. What was with these people and touching? Whatever. He held his out to shake too. Undyne gripped his hand fiercely, and when she shook, she shook his entire body. He felt like a cartoon, being lifted to his tip toes by a body builder of a woman in a tank top. Finally, she let him go. His hand throbbed.

"Could use a better grip, but you seem like an alright guy," she laughed, "you little brat."

Eridan took a deep breath, his fins flaring to make himself look larger. He was about to start spouting off insults when someone else emerged from deeper in the lab.

"Alphys! Come meet Eridan!"

Behind a door jam stood another stranger. This must be the Alphys that he and Frisk had come here looking for.

"Come here, he's nice, I promise!" Frisk urged, beaming.

Alphys blushed a bright crimson and nervously twiddled her thumbs. She then brushed off her stained lab coat and adjusted her glass. After a few more moments of nervously standing in the doorway, she came closer. Her bare feet plopped on the tiled floor.

Eridan took a moment to look her over. Alphys was short, about Frisk's height. She was a bit on the pudgy side too. Well okay, a lot, but Eridan was trying to be nice. She was also some sort of fucking lizard and that threw Eridan through another loop. Did no one on this planet look similar?

"It, uh, it's nice to meet you!" She forced a grin.

Her grin was toothy, but strained. Eridan could see drops of sweat beginning to form on her bright gold scales.

"I'm quite charmed myself," the purple blooded troll replied, unimpressed. She didn't offer to shake his hand and he was relived. He hoped for the sake of every party involved that the short lizard girl didn't perspire like Equius.

He watched her invade Undyne's personal space, still forcing her smile. Undyne clasped a grey skinned arm around her and pulled her closer.

These two were obvious matesprits. How quant.

Frisk elbowed him in the ribs, smiling too, but this smile was genuine. Eridan cocked an eyebrow as if to say 'what?'

"You should introduce yourself," they replied, "they don't know you like I do."

"You already told them my name," Eridan huffed, raising his chin in the snooty way he was so prone to.

"Yeah, but where are you from?" Undyne was suddenly on him. She let loose of Alphys in exchange for a firm grip on his shoulder as she pulled him close to her instead. "And what's with the get up?"

Her grip on him threatened to shatter his shoulder blade. He looked up at the taller woman with distaste but she didn't let up. Alphys laughed nervously and averted her eyes from him.

"I hail from Alternia. It's a beautiful planet, really. Except for all the land on it," Eridan smirked at his own joke. "It's also got two moons. As for my 'get up' as you say," Eridan motioned down to his fitted black shirt baring his symbol, "this is my zodiac. It bares my blood color, purple, the second highest in our caste system, and my sign. Aquarius is not only the first of four signs designated for my caste, but it happens to be the same one that belonged to the ancestor of all purple bloods, The Orphaner Dualscar. I also happen to own the same weapon he used."

He produced Ahab's Crosshairs from his strife deck. He kept his finger away from the trigger and the barrel of the lightning shooting harpoon gun down.

"Holy shit!" Undyne exclaimed, "that's a big ass rifle for a squirt like you!"

"Yes, well, Eridan sniffed, "I wield it quite well, thank you very much."

"Where'd you get it?"

If Eridan liked anything more than history, it was talking about himself.

"Since you asked so nicely," the troll beamed, "I'd be happy to tell you. I used to do quite a bit of extremely roll playin' with a friend of mine. We didn't stop until recently, but about a sweep ago we plundered a sunken ship. We tracked that ship for sweeps, with map after map. You see, it belonged to her ancestor, The Marquise, Spin-"

"Yeah, yeah, okay. You got it from a pirate ship?" The talker woman inquired, blowing him off.

Eridan scowled. "Yeah."

"E-excuse me," Alphys stammered, "did I hear you say your blood was purple?"

"Yes, you did hear me correctly," the troll agreed, putting his rifle back into his strife deck.

"That's so interesting!" She spoke, looking much more relaxed, "I uh, I've never heard of that before. Do, do you mind if I had a look?"

Well that wasn't creepy at fucking all.

"I suppose, but I don't know what you," Eridan didn't get to finish his sentence.

Undyne took her free hand and sort of waved it over him. He felt his knees begin to tremble and his body faltered. It was like all the warmth was leaving through his chest.

His breath was forced out of him.

He felt something welling up in the pit of his stomach.

It felt like tenacity. It felt like resolution.

It felt like determination.

In front of him, a faded, light purple, was his blood pusher. Not his blood pusher. He was aware of the real thing beating wildly in his chest. In the shape of a stereotypical redrom 'heart,' so to say, something, _some part of him_ , glowed. The purple blood's jaw dropped.

"What," he stammered, "what is that thing?"

"That's, uh, that's your, uh, soul," Alphys stuttered, she was back looking quite uncomfortable again.

"Why is that color? And, bluh, why does it feel like that?" Frisk questioned, looking between Eridan's glowing soul and Alphys. Eridan couldn't feel any changes in the air, but by the look on Frisk's face, something was off.

"It's Love," Undyne spit bitterly. "He's a troll, isn't he? That explains a lot. Bunch of war mongers."

"I'll have you know my planets army's have concord entire solar systems," Eridan wanted to fold his arms, but his soul prevented any movement foreword. "And what the fuck is Love?"

"Level of Violence," Alphys answered, "the more violent the person, the more murders they commit, the heavier your soul feels and the more uh, discolored it becomes."

"You've been busy," Undyne hissed.

"Fuck you, you don't know shit about me," Eridan growled, "put this thing back inside my body! How the fuck are you even doin' that?"

Undyne's hand fell away from his person and the heart faded from view, filling his chest once again. He felt whole again, and it felt good. Undyne's grip on him tightened.

"It's magic," she answered.

"Magic ain't real. Get the fuck off me!" The troll insisted.

Undyne threw back her head and laughed. "I just pulled your soul out of your body and your telling me magic isn't real?"

"Magic isn't real," he insisted again, "as much as I'd like to believe it is, it's not. I believe in science, not magic."

"Eridan," Frisk laughed sort of awkwardly, "magic is real. Monsters use magic to battle. Their entire body is their soul, this whole place runs on magic."

"Oh, whatever," Undyne rolled her eyes, "Alphys, you tell him."

"Uh, I uh, I'm a scientist! I have a doctorate!" The scaled woman tried, and failed, to sound sure of herself. "I'm a scientist, and I'm telling you magic is real!"

"Oh for fuck's sake," Eridan started, about ready to throw his hands up.

"Er, okay! Moving on!" Frisk interjected, "Eridan broke his computer. Your good with technology, Alphys. We were hoping you could fix it for him."

"I could have a look," she replied. Eridan produced his broken husktop from his captchaloge and handed it over.

"Oh, wow. This thing is primitive," the lizard woman laughed, "I'll fix it, and I'll make some upgrades!"

She was gone again before Eridan could blink. Undyne smiled, watching after her fondly.

"Come on you two, let's watch some anime or something," The taller fish person insisted, "she'll be a while."

* * *

Walking home through Hotland was not an option. Eridan and Undyne both couldn't breath in the dry air, so they were forced to take the river boat back to Snowdin. Lucky for Eridan, Undyne was much stronger than him. She was more than capable of pushing them back up river.

She walked them back through Snowdin, hanging around longer than Eridan thought she would. It was strange. She was strange, and she positioned herself always between Eridan and Frisk.

Frisk's house was in sight before she thought it was time for her to leave.

"Hug me goodbye!" She grinned, her pointed teeth overpowering what was supposed to look like a kind smile.

Frisk was more than happy to hug her, Undyne leaning down to wrap her too long around around the human's frame.

"You too!" She insisted, and before Eridan could protest she was pulling him in. Why was she so handsy?

He could feel her breath near his ear. This was getting weird.

"If you hurt Frisk, or Toriel, or anyone else I love, I'll fucking end you," she whispered, only for him to hear. "My spear is sharp, and I will not hesitate to put you at its business end."

And then she shoved him away from her.

"Bye guys!"

* * *

Toriel fussed and fussed over both teenagers when they arrived home.

She made them both shower and get ready for bed. Eridan first. He was in his pajamas now, and Frisk was in the shower.

The couch was comfortable. More comfortable than any couch he'd ever sat on. The blanket Toriel had given him was fluffy, soft, and white, and he'd curled up under it and warmed up quickly.

The lights were off, save for the hall light. Toriel had gone to bed to read, but only after checking on him five million times. She was a nice lady, Eridan decided.

Eridan was almost ready to go to bed himself, but he just had one last thing he wanted to check on. He ejected his husktop from his captchaloge and turned it on.

The operating system hadn't changed, but it moved so much faster. It also picked up wifi better than ever before. He logged on to Trollian at break neck speed. A message binged as soon as it loaded. Messages from _hours_ ago had piled up.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling calliginousAquarium [CA]

CG: ERIDAN

CG: YOU STUPID SHIT SLOBBING, NOOK LICKING, BULGE SUCKING, PILE OF USELESS SKUM SON OF A BITCH

CG: WHERE ARE YOU

CG: ANSWER ME YOU SHIT STAIN

CG: MESSAGE ME BACK FISH BOY

CG: FISH GIRL IS FLIPPING HER GOD DAMN LID

CA: hey kar

CG: THERE YOU ARE WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN

CG: WERE WORRIED SICK OVER HERE

CG: BUT SERIOUSLY WHERE ARE YOU FEFERI WAS SPOUTING SOME SHIT ABOUT YOU BEING OFF PLANET BUT I KNOW THATS NOT TRUE

CA: actually kar I am off planet

CA: im on this cool little rock here called underground

CA: i like it here and the sun ain't too harsh like ours

CA: actually it might be an artificial sun come to think of it

CG: I DONT FUCKING CARE

CG: YOU SHOULDNT EITHER GET YOUR ASS HOME RIGHT THIS MINUTE OR ILL PUT MY FOOT SO FAR UP YOUR ASS YOULL BE PUKING UP MY SHOE LACES YOU GOD DAMN DIMWITTED GRUB HUMPER

CG: YOU MOTHER FUCKING SANDPAPER FACED ASS WEASLE

 _Well_ he was all riled up, wasn't he?

CA: I ain't comin' home kar I told fef that earlier

CG: DO YOU READ WHAT YOUR TYPING OF DO YOU JUST BEAT THE KEYBOARD LIKE A FUCKING MORON AND HOPE THE STRING OF WORDS THAT COMES OUT IS COHERENT

CG: FEFERIS LUSUS IS HUNGRY AS SHIT AND SHES SENDING TREMORS ACROSS RGE WHOLE PLANET

CA: kar I ain't havven' this convversation wwith you too I already told fef I wwasn't comin' home and I wwasn't gonna help her feed her lusus

CA: I don't knoww wwhy it's alwways gotta be my job to feed her it ain't like the rest of you land wwalkin' assholes that could givve a shit less about wwhat they throww in the ocean you bunch a goddamn finless bastards with less sense than one of equs swweat towwels could lift a finger to help me

CG: ERIDAN IM WARNING YOU

CA: wwhat the fuck you gonna do kar somebody's gotta feed her quick

CA: just cull somebody's lusus and throww it down to fef that's howw wwe usually do it

CA: in fact ask vvris that midblooded ball of crazy spider bitch has to feed her lusus too kill the kid kill the lusus

CG: WHY ARE YOU ACTING THIS WAY ITS NEVER BOTHERED YOU BEFORE YOU FUCKING VOLUNTEERED

CA: it's botherin' me noww and im on vacation

CA: maybe then you guys wwill appreciate wwhat I do

calliginousAquarium [CA] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

Eridan signed off Trollian as fast as he could.

He heaved a heavy sign and stared down at his keyboard.

"You okay?"

Eridan jerked his head up. Frisk stood nearby, their hair dripping wet and dressed in their pajamas.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Well, no, not really," he replied, pulling his legs up under him. That made enough room for Frisk to take up the other end of the couch.

"You sure?" They pried, "I mean, I know I'm not your uh, what was the pale one again?"

"Moirail," he filled in.

"Yeah. I know I'm not your moirail, but I'll listen."

"I don't think you're the one who should be in the middle of this feelin's jam," he muttered, pulling up tighter into himself.

Frisk's gentle expression I remained unchanged. "Is this about what happened to your soul? What made it so pale and heavy?"

Eridan nodded.

He felt guilty talking to Frisk about this. Frisk was happy. They deserved to be happy. They didn't need all this nonsense of his.

"You killed a lot of people, didn't you?"

He nodded again.

"Did you have to?" They inquired.

"Yeah," he agreed, breathless. "I'm the Orphaner."

"You make other kids in to orphans?" Frisk clarified.

Eridan nodded once more. "I have to."

Frisk's arms wrapped around him, pulling him to their chest. They might have been small, but their grip was firm and caring. Eridan slumped into them.

"I have to. I have to and I can't ever stop. Not until a new Orphaner is chosen. I kill those kids parent and I leave them to die," words felt like vomit on his tongue. " I don't know what you're even huggin' me for. You should hate me. I make other trolls miserable like you used to be."

His voice cracked as he fought back a sob.

"My culture is violence, it's kill or be killed, but why do I feel so bad about this?"

Frisk' swords were calm and reassuring.

"You're only human, Eridan."

* * *

Alright, so the whole basis of this story was on a post i saw on tumblr and adopted as a headcanon. I can't remember the original poster

Alright, so Eridan acts the way he does (selfish, entitled, snobby) because he's the only constant in his own life. It's implied that he is the sole provider of food for feferi's lusus. That is a lot of weight on the shoulders of a 13 year old boy. Feferi's lusus is huge. He has to kill a lot of parents. He had to orphan a lot of kids. Orphaning a kid was grounds for culling.

He used to role play, and the way i read the comic, it appears Vriska was the only friend that he made that didn't die after he meet them. He hates land dwellers because they make up the majority of the population. No land dwellers, less kids to orphan.

This poor kid is surrounded by death and I would assume that even though Alternia is a violent society, he feels bad, just like Vriska did after she killed Tavros.

I hope I wrote Undyne alright here. I really like her and I wanted to do her justice. She immediately saw Eridan as a threat, but shes almost as rude as he is so? Take it or leave it I guess haha


	4. Chapter 4

Eridan woke to the smell of food.

Something was in a frying pan crackling, something sweet smelling.

He was stretched out on the couch with his arm draped over his closed eyes. Silently, he moved, sitting up to blink away sleep. The windows were uncovered, the drapes tied back with a yellow ribbon. The table was set once again.

Another meal together? One wasn't enough?

Eridan stood up and peeked into the nearby kitchen. Frisk and Toriel were both already dressed for the day, facing away from him and shuffling around in the kitchen.

Toriel was making pancakes, Eridan decided, and she was making a ton of them. Absentmindedly, Eridan hoped his lusus was getting enough to eat. This was his fourth day away from home.

Home.

Last night came rushing back to him. His cheeks flushed violet.

Eridan didn't think it was possible to regret something that much, but damn, here he was and there was all that regret.

Jegus on a two wheeled device. Bicycle, whatever. Ugh, now he was using low blood terminology. He needed to get it together, and fast.

Turning away from the kitchen, he went to the bathroom and changed clothes. He grabbed his husktop on the way out and turned it on, deciding to wait until the food was done to mention he was awake.

He thought about logging in to Trollian.

That was a bad idea. As soon as somebody saw him online they'd start into him again. If Karkat knew he was away, everybody must. Feferi didn't usually talk to Karkat. Sure they were on good terms, but Feferi didn't go to Karkat for help. She went to Sollux.

That arrogant mustard blooded garbage heap with a duality fetish.

That douche must have told Karkat, not to mention all the other fuckin low down filthy bastards that Eridan mistakenly called 'friends.'

Eridan was seething by the time Frisk strode out of the kitchen carrying a platter of pancakes.

"You're awake!" They grinned.

Somehow Eridan had got lucky. Tolls couldn't stand the sunlight on Alternia, but sunlight, or whatever glowing apparatus that lit the place, was tolerable on Underground. Daytime here spanned the same length as nighttime on Alternia, despite rates of planetary rotation.

It was pure coincidence that it worked out this way.

"Yes, appears that way,," he sniffed, rubbing the blur out of his eye. He still felt sleepy.

"Foods on," Frisk's grin refused to dampen. He got up off the couch as Toriel emerged from the kitchen.

Breakfast was calm and relaxing.

It was inspiring almost. Eridan thought he should ask to take a cook book home with him. He should get a construction drone to build him a dining room, and put seahorse dad's bowl on the table.

It wouldn't be exact, but it would be close to this.

He helped Toriel clean up as Frisk got dressed for the day.

Once clad in their signature sweater, Frisk reentered the room and proceeded to accost Eridan with their plans for the day.

"A friend of mine texted me this morning, they heard you were in town and wanted to meet you!" Frisk grinned, "Sans and Papyrus live close by, in Snowdin actually. Would you like to go visit?"

"Whatever floats your boat," Eridan replied, wrapping his scarf tighter around his neck as they exited the house.

"I like the way you say words with W in them," Frisk pointed out, "I thought that your W key was stuck or something but you really talk that way."

Eridan rolled his eyes. "Well of course I do. That's the point of a typing quirk, isn't it?"

Frisk just shrugged and lead the way up the path, through the forest, and into Snowdin.

"I told them we were coming, but I can't promise they're going to act like it," Frisk joked, pulling their hands into the sleeves of their sweater. Eridan wasn't sure if they were cold or if it was out of habit.

"Should I be worried?" Eridan cocked an eyebrow.

"Maybe?" The human laughed awkwardly. "Pap is kinda over the top. He's never meet a troll before and I'm sure he's going to lose it when he sees you."

"Where did he hear I was in town?" The troll promoted. The cold didn't bother him, he was already cold blooded. He did, however, notice the human beginning to shiver. Why they'd worn shorts with a sweater in winter was beyond him. He shrugged off his cape and draped it over Frisk's shoulders.

"Thanks, but it wasn't Papyrus that asked to meet you, it was Sans. He heard it from Undyne," Frisk's grin dropped from their face. "That's strange. Pap is way closer to Undyne than Sans is."

"I wouldn't worry about it," Eridan quickly passed it off. The last thing he wanted was Frisk to worry about was the overprotective fish bitch and her threats last night.

"This is their house here."

Eridan hadn't even noticed they'd walked halfway through town. Then again, the town was tiny. The house was two story, and fairy large, with a balcony off the second story. Near the road were mailboxes, one larger box, stuffed to the brim with junk. The other was labeled Papyrus in large, block letters. The lawnring didn't have any sort of decoration leading up to the log house, and the front door was plain as could be. Frisk knocked three times, and then stood back.

The door flung open in a way Eridan had only seen on TV. The aquatic troll's eyes widened and he took a step back.

Standing in front of him was a fucking skeleton. This place never ceased to amaze him. He? It appeared to be a he, was tall, taller than Eridan and a few inches taller then Undyne. His shoulders were wide set and broad in comparison to his skinny hips. The skull perched on top of his exposed vertebrae was oval shaped, and he smiled without any lips. Eridan was freaked right the fuck out already.

"Frisk!" The skeleton's shrill voice exclaimed loudly. Eridan took another step back.

Next to him, Frisk grinned warmly. "Hey Pap!"

"Have you come to join our morning festivities?" The stranger inquired, leaning out of the doorway and looming over them just a bit. Eridan's eyebrows furrowed. Did this guy not see him standing there?

"You called me like an hour ago and invited me over," the human deadpanned.

The skeleton was quiet for a moment. "… So I did."

"Hey, Papyrus, I'd like you to meet my friend. This is Eridan," Frisk motioned sideways, shifting the attention from themselves to him.

It was like a light switch was flipped.

"A troll! What a creature! I have never seen anything along like likes of you before!" The skeleton boomed, "I am the great Papyrus! And you are?"

Was he seriously..? Frisk had just told him..?

"Eridan Ampora."

"What a fanciful and unique name! Not quite as exciting as my own, of course, but excellent none the less! I extend a cordial invitation into my home!" The skeleton swept his hand to the side, motioning them in as he stepped aside in an over the top manor. Eridan narrowed his eyes but followed Frisk in anyway.

The house was larger than Frisk's, with a staircase at one end and a dining set on the other. A kitchen beyond that. Settled in the middle was a cozy living room, with a TV and a warn, green sofa. Seated on the sofa was another skeleton.

"Welcome, welcome!" Papyrus bellowed, "this is my house! Please, do make yourself at home."

Eridan didn't speak. Instead he made a disgruntled face and folded his arms. Papyrus had his attention turned to the other skeleton, who stared back at him with a lazy, uninterested grin. Finally Papyrus sighed.

"If you won't introduce yourself, lazy bones, I suppose I will. This is my big brother, Sans! Sans, say hello to our guest."

"Hello to our guest," Sans, the brother mocked. His legs were bent, but they didn't touch the carpet, signifying that he was much, much shorter than his brother, probably around Frisk's height. His blue jacket was stained but he didn't seem to care. Eridan wrinkled his nose in disgust.

Papyrus sighed again. "Oh, whatever. At least it wasn't a pun this time."

"You know you love all of my jokes, Pap," Sans drawled, "they're all pretty punny if I do say so myself."

Frisk and Papyrus groaned in unison.

"Anyway, I heard you weren't from around here. How ya liken' it on Underground?" the ever grinning skeleton chatted.

Something about him was off. Eridan glared into empty eye sockets that stared back, unmoving. He thought, just for a single instant, a fleck of blue energy lit up the right socket, like a match lighting on stone, but it was gone just as soon as it appeared. Cold chills ran down Eridan's spine. Something about this guy was off.

"It's fine," the violet blood muttered.

"Yeah?" He inquired, sliding off of the sofa and migrating to the kitchen. "Just 'fine'?"

Eridan wasn't sure what he was getting at. "The sun is an improvement. The climate is," he paused and then continued in a sour tone, "questionable."

"I took him to Hotland yesterday," Frisk added.

Sans appeared in the kitchen doorway, holding a bottle of red liquid and popped the top on it. Eridan figured it was some kind of condiment.

"Do you gotta do that in front of us?" Frisk stuck out their tongue. Sans just shrugged and kicked it back, chugging it like water. Eridan's shoulders raised and his nose scrunched in disgust.

"Ignore him! Please!" Papyrus interjected, stepping in front of Eridan to block his line of sight. "My brother does not have the best manners!"

"I'm gatherin' that, fairly quickly," Eridan huffed, "who in their right mind drinks grubsause? Like some kinda a wriggler their lusus forgot to feed?"

"Grubsause?" Frisk's eyebrows rose, "that just as sounds gross."

"You ain't even tried it," Eridan rolled his eyes.

"Not tryin' to rile anyone up," Sans dismissed, trying to defuse Eridan's frustration, "but I was thinkin we should get this show on the road."

"And just what does that mean?" Eridan inquired, putting a hand on his hip haughtily.

Sans shifted his weight, leaning backwards and shoving his hands in his pockets. "It was supposed ta' be a surprise, but there's a festival in town, in the Capitol city. Pap and I was gonna take you two."

"Oh! The flower festival! Thanks, you guys, that's really sweet of you," Frisk grinned. Papyrus scooped up Frisk, spinning them around and crushing them to his chest.

"Anything for you!"

Eridan observed Papyrus's expression and then Frisk's. He knew quadrants were troll only, but their relationship looked like a moirallegiance if Eridan had ever saw one. Sans's mile wide smile had somehow morphed from disturbingly happy to a more sincere glad. He looked calm, all without losing an inch on his ear to ear smile.

"Oh! We can't take Eridan back though Hotland though," Frisk chatted as they remembered the way to Capitol city.

"That's alright," Sans sneered, "I got a short cut."

"Yes!" Frisk cheered excitedly, a look of elation crossing their face. They wiggled out of Papyrus's arms to stand flat on the floor. "Eridan, watch. Sans is gonna do magic!"

Eridan rolled his eyes. Again with the magic? Sure. He'd believe it when he saw it. He shifted his weight to his other hip and tapped his foot impatiently.

Sans, on the other hand, was trying to concentrate. He took a deep breath, held it, and then released, gathering his thoughts. Like a flame on a candle wick, pale blue lit his right eye socket. Goose bumps ripped though Eridan's skin like wild fire. There is was again!

Wind picked up even though they were indoors. Eridan's scarf flapped in the breeze. What was this wise guy trying to pull? This was a bad fan trick if Eridan had ever seen one.

Sans jacket blew away from him, the tails fanned out behind him in one final gust before it all settled.

"Heh, guess I got carried away," Sans muttered, "Try that on for size, short stop."

Frisk raced to the front door and threw it open, revealing a bustling city street. The buildings were slate grey, perhaps made of aged marble, and they stood tall and proud. Fresh air greeted Eridan. Gone was the crisp air of Snowden, now sweet, flowery scents floated on the breeze.

"Go see for yourself," Sans urged, motioning to the door. Hesitantly, Eridan stepped up behind Frisk.

They were really here, really some place different. There was no way this could be staged. It wasn't possible to fake this. Eridan's jaw went slack.

People walked by with arm fulls and arm fulls of yellow flowers, the same bright yellow buds Eridan had face planted in when he arrived.

"Know how I told you that mom used to be queen?" Frisk asked quietly.

"Yeah," Eridan agreed.

"She's not the queen anymore because of what happened between her and the King, Asgore. They separated after they lost their son," the human's tone was solemn, "every year, Asgore hold this festival in memory of their son. Mom hates it."

"Why does he do it if he knows it upsets his wife?" Eridan questioned, adjusting his glasses and looking down at his friend.

"He can't get over it. It was his fault," Frisk answered.

Eridan shivered again, his goose bumps renewed. He didn't respond.

"Frisk!" Papyrus bellowed, "and Eridan! I demand that you both escort me to the nearest elephant ear stand, post haste!"

"you got it Pap," Frisk replied, their gentle smile returning. They reached over, grasping Eridan's hand and holding out the other for Papyrus.

"Are you coming Sans?" Papyrus questioned, unmoving.

"I'll ketch-up," the shorter brother grinned, still holding the bottle, earning him a groan.

Without and further urging, Papyrus charged foreword, grasping Frisk's hand and pulling Frisk with him as he dashed out the door. Eridan was pulled along, like some kind of weird daisy chain.

Actually, Eridan felt more like a derailed train. Papyrus pulled like a champion sled dog and no matter how much he tried, he couldn't free his hand from Frisk's. When they finally stopped, it was comical. Papyrus stopped dead, Frisk crashing into his back with a "oph!" And Eridan crashing into them with a "oph!" of his own. He dusted himself off after regaining use of his hand, glaring at anyone who dared glance his way.

When the skeleton turned around, he presented Eridan and Frisk each with a plate of fried, cinnamon encrusted dough. Eridan wasn't about to argue with good food. He took it with a grumbled thank you.

Sans appeared out of nowhere, joining them like he said he would, and Eridan decided right then to avoid him. After they ate, they strolled down Main Street, glancing at vendor tents and eating their way through town.

They bought woven flower crowns, the four of them adorning them on their heads.

Festivals, Eridan decided, we're not worth the hassle. The closest thing to a holiday Alternia had was Twelfth Perigee's Eve, and that took place in a troll's own home. There were so many people, and so much to look at, it was a bit like sensory overload. Too many people and too many noises. Eridan was on edge. It was late evening though, and hopefully they'd be headed home soon.

"Come on Sans!" Papyrus urged, making the troll jump. Eridan glanced behind him to see the shorter skeleton lagging behind. He hadn't noticed, but so much was going on around him, it was tough to focus on anything.

"I got one speed bro," Sans said evenly.

"It's getting a bit late. We'd like to play a game or two before dark!" Papyrus argued.

Sans shrugged. "You guys go on ahead. I'll be right here."

Papyrus rolled his eyes with a sharp "ugh!" and continued on. Eridan paused.

"Hey, Eridan, you coming?" Frisk asked, inching away after Papyrus.

Eridan wrung his hands. It was a little less busy here. "No um, I think I'll stay here. Take a breather."

"Suit yourself!" They grinned, "We'll be right back!"

They were gone in a few moments, merging into a moving crowd and disappearing

It was a bit awkward, standing silently on the side of a noisy street with someone he didn't know. His thoughts drifted back to his lusus. And home. His hive was always quiet.

He wondered how Feferi was doing. He was still alive, so somebody must of fed her mom before she screamed loud enough to kill every troll in space.

"So, hey, buddy, you haven' fun with this game you're playin'?"

Eridan jumped. Oh. Sans was speaking to him. He'd zoned out. He furrowed his eyebrows, looking to his side where the skeleton was standing. "What kinda question is that?"

"Oh, ya know. I just thought I'd keep an eye on you is all. I heard some stuff, about you. Most of it was bad," Sans sort of shrugged, and shoved his hands into the pockets of his basketball shorts. "You don't seem so bad though. You don't act like you're lookin' to have a bad time."

"The fish bitch sent you, huh?" The violet blood Inquired, his mouth contorting into a snarl, "of course she did, that scaled hunk of ignorant, slobberin' dirty land walkin' asshole, living so far into a pit of god damn lava it fried her damn brain. I'm not out to hurt anybody, understand?"

"Never said you were," Sans replied cooly. "You seem like a pretty okay kid. Bratty, but okay. I can't deny what you are though. Still. Kids need watched. You're a kid. Sos Frisk. Can't just let you run wild."

Eridan fumed. "I don't need anyone to fuckin' baby sit me! I live alone at home, thank you!"

"That's too bad," the skeleton sighed. "Livin' with Pap is pretty great. He's a great brother."

"Where I come from, friend is the same word for enemy, and siblings are not a concept we have," Eridan informed him. He scoffed at the ridiculous of the notion, but then he realized, it was the same concept he'd come here to experience.

Sans was still eyeing him, but differently now. More concerned. "How do you live like that?"

"I hate it."

"Eridan! Sans!" Frisk's voice cut the tension between them like a hatchet. Frisk stood up the street, waving their arms. "Mom called, suppers on!"

Sans rocked back on his heals and didn't respond, he didn't even move. Eridan replied for the both of them. "Comin'!"

* * *

Just a reminder to everyone reading, after I've gotten some nasty notes here and on ao3.

I'm an amateur writer just like everyone else on this website. I write for fun, because I like it. I'm choosing to write Eridan my own way, even if that means changing the way he talks and behaves. If anyone wants to step up and beta/proof read this that'd be great. Until then, I suppose you're stuck with my mistakes. I appreciate when people catch them, but only if they do so kindly.

Id also like to clarify that I'm not trying to seek pity for Eridan, or to excuse his actions in canon. I love Eridan as a character for all the horrible things he's done.


	5. Chapter 5

Long time no update! I believe next chapter will be our last!

* * *

Kanaya began trolling Eridan just after breakfast. It was raining today, and unfortunately, Toriel had forbidden them from going out. There was nothing else to do besides get on the Internet.

grimAuxiliatrix [GA] Began trolling caligulasAquarium [CA]

GA: Hello Eridan

CA: oh jegus no kan not you too

GA: Yes I'm Afraid So

GA: It Is Me

CA: alright get on wwith it

GA: With It

GA: Oh

GA: Okay Sure

GA: Last Night A Few Of Us Narrowly Escaped Getting Feferis Lusus Fed

GA: It Nearly Killed Sollux, Tavros And Nepeta

GA: Aradia Is Already Dead So She Cant Be Hurt Or Helped At This Point

GA: But I Digress

CA: Fuck Off

GA: Thats Cute

GA: dont use my quirk you sea dwellin' jerk

CA: okay okay ill stop if you do

CA: but seriously kan i dont need you layin' in to me like im a wwriggler covered in my owwn damn saliva I can see wwhat im doin' and I dont care

GA: Here Lies The Error

GA: Let Me Ask You Something In All Seriousness All Jokes And Quirks Aside

GA: Do you want your friends to die, Eridan? Do you want us all to die?

Eridan pulled away from his husktop and glanced over at Frisk. From his position on the couch, Eridan could see them across the room, playing a handheld game. His husktop binged again with another message.

GA: Sollux Is Laid Up With A Migraine But He Requested I Tell You He Also Wants You To Return As Much As He Platonically Hates You

GA: Karkat Is Inconsolable

GA: I Myself

GA: Well

Kanaya was visibly distraught. Eridan's face contorted in worry. Trolls were a savage race, but that didn't mean they didn't have feelings. Sure, he and Feferi were used to culling, but the rest of their friends? Not so much. He was sure almost all of them had participated in some form of culling, though. He chocked it up to sympathy.

GA: Vriska Took The Lead I Didnt Want To Watch But I Did

GA: My God Do You Feel Like This Every Day

CA: it gets easier after a wwhile

GA: Oh

CA: fef was right I vvolunteered for the job

CA: I guess I did it for the wwrong reason

If Vriska was involved they'd probably gone over the top bat shit crazy. No wonder Kanaya was distressed.

Secretly, Eridan sort of wished he could bring them all to stay on Underground. To live there permanently. Okay, maybe not everybody. He could lie without… Well most of them. Alternia wasn't that great anyway.

That was impossible, though.

GA: Does That Mean Youre Coming Home

CA: no

GA: Eridan Please

CA: no

CA: id just love to come help you kan but ill tell you the same thing I told kar

CA: maybe this wwill help you appreciate wwhat i do

CA: ill unblock you when i get home

caligulasAquarium [CA] blocked grimAuxiliatrix [GA]

Immediately someone else began trolling him.

ArachnidsGrip [AG] Began trolling caligulasAquarium [CA]

What the fuck could she possibly want?

caligulasAquarium [CA] blocked ArachnidsGrip [AG]

carcinoGeneticist [CG] Began trolling caligulasAquarium [CA]

caligulasAquarium [CA] blocked carcinoGeneticist [CG]

gallowsCalibrator [GC] Began trolling caligulasAquarium [CA]

twinArmageddons [TA] Began trolling caligulasAquarium [CA]

cuttlefishCuller [CC] Began trolling caligulasAquarium [CA]

Holy mother grubbing shit! Eridan slammed his husktop closed, sending it into sleep mode and logging him out of Trollian. It took him an entire minute to get his breathing back under control.

"Are you alright, my child?"

Eridan's head snapped up. Toriel was standing in front of him.

"I hope you are not too upset about the rain," she said, her eyebrows knitted in a hopeful sort of worry.

"Oh, no, it's alright," the violet blood assured, nodding. He moved his husktop off of his lap.

"Good," she grinned, "I was wondering if perhaps you two would like to make cookies?"

She glanced behind her at Frisk who was hurriedly putting away their game.

"Sure," Eridan agreed.

The goat woman's face brightened. The tweens followed her into the kitchen.

The recipe for snail cookies called for two whole cups of sugar, which even Eridan recognized as a lot. There was also a generous amount of peanut butter and chocolate chips, enough to make Eridan's teeth hurt just looking at it.

Toriel bustled around in the kitchen, a bright yellow apron tied around her middle and a large wooden spoon in her hand. She hummed faintly while she worked, some type of lullaby. Eridan was sure he'd never heard it before, but it was familiar all the same.

She moved around the kitchen normally, but despite that, it still attracted Eridan's attention.

Seahorse dad didn't do kitchens. He barely did houses, in fact. His lusus was wild-eyed and stern. Regal, but still just an animal. When Eridan grew up and joined the other adults off planet, seahorse dad would find another grub to raise, move on. Eridan would have pictures and memories.

Toriel was something different entirely. She was a tender and she was friendly. She was a mother, not just a parent.

Eridan committed her to his memory too.

Frisk stood on a chair, in charge of spices, and added them liberally. The whole house smelled like cinnamon and hazelnut, warm and comforting.

Eridan more or less stood off to the side, retrieving items and measuring out liquids, a cup of water, a dash of vegetable oil, whatever they needed really.

Things went into the bowl, combining into a sweet smelling concoction confection of sugary goodness. If this didn't rot all his teeth then nothing would.

When it came time to add the snails, though, Toriel checked the fridge and pulled away looking distraught.

"It seems we're out of snails," she frowned.

Frisk was busy in the cupboard, and Eridan didn't want to trouble the woman.

"I'll get you some," the violet blood piped up, "where do I get them?"

"Thank you, my child," Toriel grinned, handing Eridan a clean measuring cup, "just go on out to the garden, and pull a few up from the flowers."

She pointed to the three-fourths of a cup line. "Just enough to fill here. Do not get too wet, won't you?"

"Yes ma'am," Eridan replied respectfully and scurried outside and into the rain.

Eridan didn't mind the rain. As a sea troll, he liked water. The sky was dim, but it didn't quite catch his night vision. The drops falling from the sky weren't large, more medium sized. They fell slowly and sparsely, in a gentle, pitter-pattering sprinkle.

Eridan wasn't sure where to look for snails. They weren't in the cups if the flowers or on the ground near the roots. He managed to find a few under the leaves of bright yellow flowers. He started plucking right away, watching them suck back into their shells as he dropped them in the cup.

He got down on his knees, parting the pale stalks gently so as not to damage Toriel's plants. Eridan plucked snails, filling the cup in just a matter of a few minutes.

"Couple more should do it," he muttered to himself.

"Couple more what was that?"

Eridan jumped, twisting around. Where had that voice come from?

"Down here, jerk face!"

Eridan jerked his head down. Directly in front of him one of the flowers turned to face him, with its very own face looking back.

"I, what?" He stammered, "what, who are you?"

"Names Flowey! Flowey the flower," the creature replied, grinning back at him.

"Eridan," the sea troll replied, shifting back to sit flat on the ground instead of hunched over.

"Well, you're not so new to Underground, are ya? Seen you around here for the past few days," the flower pointed out. Something about him, it? Seemed off. Tricky, or sly.

"Yes," Eridan agreed. "I'm staying with Frisk and Toriel. I'm on vacation. Do you just, life out here? In the flower bed?"

"I kinda just mosey. I'm not rooted in just one place. You said you were on vacation? Where are you from, friend?" Flowey looked a bit smug as he spoke.

"I'm from Alternia, another planet," Eridan looked down, catching an escaping snail and plopping it down in the measuring cup. "Why are you out here? Are you looking for Toriel? I could get her for you if you like."

"No, no!" Flowey quickly rejected, "no. I don't think she'd recognize me, anyway. I just came to see how she was."

"Don't think you'd recognize you how?" Eridan inquired. This was getting suspicious. Ahab's Crosshairs was just a sylladex card away if he needed it.

"Oh I, um. I used to look different is all. I was," Flowey paused, thinking, "taller. And I used to act a lot different too. I was kinder."

"Would you like me to tell her you stopped by?" Eridan asked.

"Nah, that's alright. I'll stop by again when I'm ready." The flowers expression changed, his smile becoming more genuine. "I'm still me under here. And I've got time to see her again. Have fun on your vacation, Eridan."

Before Eridan could bid him farewell, he disappeared. Flowey sunk down into the ground, pulling yellow petals into a small hole just slightly bigger than his stem. Eridan stared blankly at the spot for just a moment and then got to his feet.

He looked over his shoulder to the flower bed once, before he let himself back into the house.

"Got the snails!" Eridan called, jogging his way into the kitchen.

"Excellent!" Toriel cheered, "did you get too wet, dear?"

"I'm alright," Eridan replied, but upon looking down he noticed he was dripping.

"Oh, child, please go change! I don't want you to catch a cold!" The goat woman chitted, pushing him back out of the room after taking the cup of snails from him. Eridan did as asked, stopping to grab a dry set of clothes from his bag.

He changed quickly in the bathroom, towel drying his hair and horns.

When he opened the door to leave the room, he noticed a large mirror on the wall.

Had that been here the entire time? A quick look over it said it had, there was a thin layer of dust over the more ornate decorations on the gold frame.

Eridan looked himself over in it. His cheeks were a little rosier, and his hair was lacking gel. His clothes were cleaner after Toriel taught him to properly use a washing machine, and he might have also gained a few much-needed pounds. He thought, maybe, just maybe, he might be a little kinder too. More accepting.

But despite everything, it was still him.

Flowey was right. Underneath all of that, he was still Eridan Ampora.

Eridan knew what he had to do now. No matter how much he didn't want to.


	6. Chapter 6

June 16, 201X

underDetermined [UD] began pestering caligulasAquarium [CA]

UD: Hey Eridan!

UD: how are you?

UD: We're.. all a little worried! I know it takes you awhile to get between here and your planet, but mom and I, and Sans even wanted me to see if you made it home!

caligulasAquarium [CA] is an idle chum!

UD: Message me when you get this!

underDetermined [UD] is an idle chum!

caligulasAquarium [CA] is an active chum!

CA: hey

underDetermined [UD] is an active chum!

UD: Hey! How are you?

CA: tired, mostly

UD: Long trip?

CA: yeah, plus I got home to goddamn chaos

CA: I land and they made a camp out of my lawn ring

CA: front yard wwhatever.

CA: apparently they been doin' whatever since I left

CA: I knoww I told you I wwas an orphaner and it made me feel real bad but I had to go they needed me here

CA: I swwooped in murdered some poor assholes parent and savved all their asses from the same mental trauma I wwent through though so I guess it wwas wworth it

CA: there's no moral to the story I keep killin' I keep feelin' bad and were all just stuck like this for noww but I think you showwed me the right wway it wwont be like this forever

UD: You always have a home on the Underground, Eridan!

UD: In fact! After you left everyone was so worried they all asked for your pesterchum! Or trollian, same difference. Would it be okay if I gave it out?

CA:

CA: are you bein' serious? Theyre wworried about me?

UD: I am!

CA: sure okay they can have it

UD: I'll pass it out! Hold on just a second!

underDetermined is an idle chum!

underDetermined is an active chum!

UD: There we go! I had a better idea though, hold on.

underDertermined created a group chat: Friends!

UD: There! Now we can all talk together!

calousedAquarius [CA] joined the chat!

CA: HEY KID! It's Undyne! where the hell'd you go?

coolSkeleton [CS] joined the chat!

CS: Eridan! It is I! The great Papyrus! Why did you leave without saying good bye?

sans [SANS] joined the chat!

SANS: hey

SANS: guess who

CA: first of all you hellwitch I had to go home

CA: second of all couldnt you a picked a better username sans

SANS: I could of sure

SANS: but I didnt

CA: HELLWITCH?! WHO YOU CALLIN HELLWITCH LITTLE BOY?!

CS: WHY ARE WE YELLING?

UD: Haha!

* * *

December 31, 202X

The journey was familiar. As was stepping off the ship into the tall, jade green grass that covered the planet's surface. Eridan never could get used to the jump though. Plumping down into pitch darkness never got easier, but there was always a patch of bright yellow flowers there to cushion his fall.

Light beamed from overhead, highlighting the dandelion colored petals. Soft hues laid gently over their dark shadows, giving a dreamy look to Eridan's immediate view. But it wasn't a dream. This was real.

"Eridan!" A voice above him exclaimed.

"Frisk!" The violet blood returned, peeling himself off of the ground to embrace his long time friend.

"Happy six year friend-iversary!" Frisk squeezed him tight, and Eridan squeezed right back, plucking the smaller human off of the floor and swinging them around.

"Three solar sweeps is too long to go without seein' you!" He beamed.

"I was so happy to hear that your friend won when she challenged your old empress! I'm so happy she picked you as the ambassador to Underground's solar system!" Frisk grinned ear to ear as Eridan sat them down. They brushed a yellow petal out of his hair and released their hug in favor of grabbing his hand.

"I am nine solar sweeps now! A man's man!" Eridan puffed out his chest.

"Right, and being a little sweet on her had nothing to do with it," Frisk said smugly, cocking an eyebrow.

Eridan rolled his eyes, a little blush coming to his features to twinge his cheeks a faint violet.

"But hey! Come on!" Frisk tugged his arm, "everyone is waiting for you! Mom made butterscotch pie and everything!"

Eridan didn't need telling twice and they took off running, the both of them headed home.

* * *

Thank you, everybody, for following this story! I hope the ending was all you wanted even though it was short! All the comments, Kudos, favorites and bookmarks meant a lot to me!

There was a moral here, contrary to Eridan's belief. That is Things Get Better.


End file.
